In an era where 79% of us have social media accounts—where we share everything from what we’ve eaten for breakfast, to pictures of our dogs, to major life changes—it seems only natural that we would share facts relating to a divorce. The angrier you are, the more you may feel the need to post about all of the awful things that your ex has done. Resist the temptation. Let’s talk about a few social media mistakes that people commonly make during divorce and explain why it’s so important to avoid them.
(Don’t go) Trashing Your Ex
If you feel you must post something, focus on what you’re doing and not what your ex has done. Don’t risk exposing your kids, your business associates, and your relatives to all your or your spouse’s dirty laundry. Don’t force your friends into feeling like they must be involved and take sides in the divorce. Also, realize that all of that information will get back to your ex, and your ex’s lawyer. You don’t want to give them ammo for your divorce litigation.
(Don’t go) Venting about How Horrible They are, or Terrible You Feel
Given the impact a divorce may have on one’s financial circumstance, people may end up changing jobs after a divorce. Your social media conduct during the divorce may follow you during this move: Penn State researchers recently found that 80% of employers look at applicants’ social media posts when making hiring decisions. And 60% of employers say that they are less likely to hire someone whose posts come off as negative or self-absorbed.
(Don’t go) Advertising Your Great New Life
You may want to show everyone how great your new life is, now that you’re getting divorced—new haircut, new house, new wardrobe, and so on. Maybe you’ve finally taken that bucket list trip to the Bahamas. However, avoid sharing information that could be interpreted to mean you’re in a great place, financially. This could be used against you during in a divorce proceeding.
(Don’t go) Spending A Lot of Time Online
Studies show that most people carefully curate social media posts to give everyone an artificially positive view of their lives. However, they don’t realize most people’s feeds are just as distorted as theirs. So the more time people spend online, the worse they feel about their own lives. Rather than wasting time seeing these rose-colored versions of other people’s lives, limit your time online. Focus on doing things to take care of yourself to make your life better in the real world.
A divorce impacts every aspect of your life. It’s never just changing your relationship status from “married” to “single.” For much of this process, your status will likely be “it’s complicated.” Try keeping the complication to yourselfs; it may make them less complicated.